Hamza scolding Safiya: "You pacifically saw me and you purposely on purpose closed the door!”
Jul 27 2010
reason #90: the most annoying group
Wife: “Are teenagers the most annoying group?”
Me: “No”
Wife: “Then who is?”
Me (jokingly): “Wives”
Wife: “Because I told the kids teens were the most annoying group, ask anyone”
Me: “No, wives”
Wife: “Because they never listen”
Me: “WIVES”
Wife: “Because they just don’t pay attention”
Me, really slowly: “Wiiiiivvvvvveeeessss”
Wife: “…Cuz they don’t listeennnnnn”
Me, spelling: “W.I.V.E.S”
Wife: “Oh”
Jul 22 2010
reason #89: love
Safya: “When you fall in love, do you get dizzy and faint?”
”No”
Safya: ”Then how do you know you are in love?”
Jul 21 2010
reason #88: vanishing followers
One day I have 150 twitter followers, the next it goes down to 149. One day my facebook page is liked by 70 people, I check again and it’s down to 68.
Was it something I said? Don’t you like me anymore? Am I boring now? Did I hurt your feelings? If you are going to ‘unlike’ my page, at least tell me what I did. Oh why won’t you tell me? Wait, if you aren’t following me then you aren’t reading this.
Does it help if I tell you every time someone ‘un-likes’ this page, the terrorists win? It’s my hair, isn’t it? ISN’T IT?
Jul 16 2010
reason #87: ridiculously good looking
My kids have destroyed my brain cells. I have no wit left.
My wife calls me ridiculous. In my head the conversation went like this:
Wife: “You are ridiculous”
Me: “Ya, ridiculously good looking”
However, the neurons got confused on the way to my tongue and in real life, these words came out of my mouth:
Wife: “You are ridiculous”
Me: “Umm, my face is ridiculously good looking”
It just didn’t work like it did in my head. Stupid disconnect between my brain and my mouth.
Jul 14 2010
reason #86: black girl and white guy
Ayaan’s been referring to people by the colour of their clothes. The guy with a red shirt becomes “the red guy” and the girl with yellow pants becomes the “yellow girl”.
Imagine my horror when at a grocery store we see an interracial couple (the girl with darker pigmentation had black shirt and the Caucasian guy had white shirt on). Ayaan points at them and yells out: “look, black girl and white guy.”
I so wanted the Earth to swallow me at that moment.